Merry Christmas

1 And it came to pass, that in those days there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus, that the whole world should be enrolled.

2 This enrolling was first made by Cyrinus, the governor of Syria.

3 And all went to be enrolled, every one into his own city.

4 And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth into Judea, to the city of David, which is called Bethlehem: because he was of the house and family of David,

5 To be enrolled with Mary his espoused wife, who was with child.

6 And it came to pass, that when they were there, her days were accomplished, that she should be delivered.

7 And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him up in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.

8 And there were in the same country shepherds watching, and keeping the night watches over their flock.

9 And behold an angel of the Lord stood by them, and the brightness of God shone round about them; and they feared with a great fear.

10 And the angel said to them: Fear not; for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, that shall be to all the people: 7 "Her firstborn"... The meaning is, not that she had afterward any other child; but it is a way of speech among the Hebrews, to call them also the firstborn, who are the only children. See annotation Matt. 1. 25.

11 For, this day, is born to you a Saviour, who is Christ the Lord, in the city of David.

12 And this shall be a sign unto you. You shall find the infant wrapped in swaddling clothes, and laid in a manger.

13 And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly army, praising God, and saying:

14 Glory to God in the highest; and on earth peace to men of good will.

15 And it came to pass, after the angels departed from them into heaven, the shepherds said one to another: Let us go over to Bethlehem, and let us see this word that is come to pass, which the Lord hath showed to us.

16 And they came with haste; and they found Mary and Joseph, and the infant lying in the manger.

17 And seeing, they understood of the word that had been spoken to them concerning this child.

18 And all that heard, wondered; and at those things that were told them by the shepherds.

19 But Mary kept all these words, pondering them in her heart. 20 And the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God, for all the things they had heard and seen, as it was told unto them.

Luke 2: 1-20

Merry Christmas.

Donald Tremblay

That Most Evil of Holidays

(A speech from a progressive politician in Anywhere, USA)

Attention, everyone! I have an announcement.

It’s that time of the year again—time for the most evil holiday on the calendar.

Christmas.

We must resume our annual battle to prevent the open celebration of Jesus’ birth. Our main point of attack will continue to focus on the notion that Christmas displays create hostile environments for non-believers. Playing the victim card continues to work well. We’ve been able to virtually eliminate Nativity scenes from the public sphere, and we’ve white-washed the term Christmas tree and replaced it with the conventional Holiday tree. Public schools have proven invaluable. Christmas concerts have been replaced by Winter Festivals. Children may sing about Kwanzaa and even Hanukkah, but the only "Christmas" songs allowed are those generic winter songs about sleigh-riding, Santa, and winter wonderlands.

What is that you’re saying in the back of the room? The majority of Americans want Christmas decorations publically displayed? Forget them. We who are offended by Jesus have the final say . . . even if there are only a limited number of us. When you have as many supporters in the judiciary as we have, the number of followers is irrelevant. If those Jesus Freaks want to celebrate his birthday then let them go to a church.

On to the next item: I have in my hand a few of the anti-Christmas strategies that have been put into effect by other towns around the nation. These are just two examples; there are many more that will be enacted over the next few weeks.

Last weekend the town of Patchogue, NY celebrated its 15^th annual boat parade. Formerly the Patchogue Christmas Boat Parade, the name was changed to the Patchogue Holiday Boat Parade because of "complaints that the use of ‘Christmas’ seemed to make the parade less inclusive". (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,443785,00.html) Fireworks by Grucci withdrew their fireworks donation to protest the change, but so what? Getting rid of the word Christmas is what matters.

"Florida Gulf Coast University (FGCU) administration has banned all holiday decorations from common spaces on campus and canceled a popular greeting card design contest, which is being replaced by an ugly sweater competition. In Griffin Hall, the university's giving tree for needy preschoolers has been transformed into a ‘giving garden.’" (http://www.news-press.com/article/20081125/NEWS0104/811250380/1075 )

Pretty good, right?

Yes, yes. I understand you’re frustrated because you still have to confront those offensive decorations on people’s private property. Be patient. Think about how much we’ve accomplished in just the past 10 years. Eventually we’ll be able to concoct some law that your rights are being violated by the very sight of these hateful Christian symbols regardless of where they are displayed.

And remember to look at the total picture. Each year more people accept the minimizing of Christmas. We have succeeded in making them feel powerless to stop our onslaught. Plus, we are now rearing generations of children who are clueless as to how widespread the Christmas holiday once was. In another 20 years our followers will be legion.

Let’s meet again next week. We have much work to be done.

Donald Tremblay

You Didn’t Hear This From Me, But . . . Merry Christmas

Well, it’s that time of the year again: time for Christ-phobes to complain about Christmas celebrations in public places. Once again we must endure weeks of whining about how seeing a Nativity scene and hearing the words “Merry Christmas” creates an exclusionary, hostile environment that leaves non-Christians feeling threatened. 2008’s first incidence of Christ-phobia takes place in Long Island, NY in the town of Patchogue.

On Nov 23 the town will hold its 15^th annual boat parade along the Patchogue River. Last year the name of the parade was the Patchogue Christmas Boat Parade. This year the name has been changed to the Patchogue Holiday Boat Parade because of “complaints that the use of ‘Christmas’ seemed to make the parade less inclusive.” (http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5gfA-XFWFSZjLAt-oIzxwehAhx4xgD9409U000) Organizers tried to justify the change by arguing that “the parade has had several names over its roughly 15-year existence”, but one group who rejected that explanation is the Grucci fireworks company. Last year Grucci donated $5,000 of fireworks to the parade. This year the parade will get zilch:

“The company's vice president, Philip Butler, who has criticized the secularization of Christmas in the past, said parade organizers were ‘using all the themes of Christmas and plagiarizing all those themes.’"

Bravo to Grucci. Not only should Patchogue Christians boycott the parade, but they should spend that evening decorating their property with as many Nativity displays and “Merry Christmas” signs as they can fit.

Merry Christmas . . . and get ready for a ridiculous two months.

Donald Tremblay